i felt quite down recently..
like as though i lack of something happening in my life.

i dono why i felt that way.

i just felt frustrated.
in everything.
in my life.
i want total freedom.

but somehow or another,
i felt tied.

by work.
even though i don work for long hours,
or i should say,
i onli work abt 2 to 3 hrs a day,
for weekdays
in pri sch,
or teaching private students.

i hate this feeling.
but when i come to think abt it,
if i had total freedom,
i'll hate it too.
i'll have nothing to do.

i'll dono wad to do.
i'll think twice when i wan to go out,
like 'go where?'
'with who?'

my dear works every weekday,
of cos i can't expect to have his company

and i couldn't possibly go out with jun yuan and shi chao all the time,
cos jun yuan nid work,
and acc his gf too..

and i can't possibly go out with just shi chao,
cos i jus cant see that happening,
after finally knowing him.

i can't go out alone either too.
i felt too pathetic.

so u see why im waiting for nafa to start.

to hav e my own life,
my new bunch of frens of the same interest.

i've lead this life for more than a year.
i really nid this to stop.

but there's simply no way for it to stop.